BRIGHTON STATE OF MIND

I'm a huge fan of Brighton. I have been for a good while. I have a lot of good memories here and every time I go back, it always gives me more and more to enjoy and appreciate.
It's a different world there, a better world. People get on, no matter what their background or sexual preferences are.  It's a seperate universe where 50 year olds can happily skateboard down the run without a second glance, same-sex couples can walk hand-in-hand in the street without reprisal.
I wish this way of thinking could be, as the corporate world would say, "rolled out" to other cities.
For me, there is enough for this gleeful man child; indie comic book shops, old school t-shirt and poster shops where you can buy a Sid James mug as a Christmas gift and a Japanese Wizard of Oz tote back for the wife. There is a pier with decent rides that, despite being alone on the ride, I can get myself spun around and scared for a few minutes at a time.
I feel perfectly at home here and, if I can't live here physically, I can at least do that mentally. I want to take that mentality, and community spirit, home with me to Leicester, a place that is, on the whole, more forward thinking than most (but still very much a work in progress). I want to make sure that I live the right way, being as positive as I can to people around me.
Over the past couple of weeks, I have tried to mend fences, extend olive branches and basically be a better person to myself and others.
I know that I have something wrong with me and medication can only ever do so much. It's the foundation for me to push myself and make things better. I've tried as much as possible to get out of my comfort zone, to stop shutting the world out and letting things happen. At 37, this is a 'better late than never' scenario. I'm still young in life, but too old to let it get to me and reduce me to someone I'm not.
I want to create, to make people laugh in any small way. I want to work hard, do the right thing in my job and make sure that I stay true to who I am and how I choose to live my life. I want to push back when that's needed and I want ti fight for what I believe in. There are ways and means of doing it and measured, calculated responses are better than knee-jerk reactions using a keyboard.
I need to see more of my family. I need to get on a train and see friends. I need a lot of things and that's the fuel that stokes the fire. Constantly chasing something is better than being rested and bored.