I've just recieved a message from my ex. We haven't spoken in a good year after a series of her dumping on me (Not literally) and making my life all hell. Today she dropped me a SMS out of the blue about checking my mobile bill because she found out from looking at her statements that she's been having insurance cover taken out.
(We got our phones together a few years ago. We used to do coupley things because she went insane)
Why would she give a shit about my finances or my well being?
What's your take on this, guys and girls? It befuddled me...
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21 comments:
Belated attempt to be civil and mature
OR
She's lonely and just wants to hear from you
sounds to me like an olive branch - I suggest you should hit her over the head with it!
Something similar happened to me.
My Ex contacted me about 3 months ago because I was apparently on her credit report ( we had a joint account ) and she was worried that I should check mine and have her name removed from my credit history if I so desired..
..thats all well and good but she decided to tell me this after 18 months of no contact, phoning me at work on a number there was no way in Gods green earth she should have been able to get without some stalking skills.
Oh dear.
I say dont even reply. She's messed you around too much to be nice to you now.
you've come far down the path to liking yourself and being settled, don't let anyone knock you off course
Guys and girls,
Thank you for your feedback on this touchy subject. I responded with 'Thank you. I'll look into it when I get the chance' (This was before I saw Steve's comment)
I don't want to encourage more banter. She almost, ALMOST ruined me last time but she doesn't have that power anymore.
I'm just struck by the randomness of it all. I still have stuff at her house (and she has stuff at mine) why doesn't she text about that? I could even understand drunken abusive texts...
I agree with the general consensus.
Always remember why things went pear-shaped (I never understood that expression) when someone from the past pops up into the present. Be civil but suspicious. You have a great life post- her and don't need her, even as a friend.
But don't hit her over the head with any branches!
has she by any chance found out about your recent success? i know it's an awful thing to say, but some people are like that. they can't appreciate something until the whole world appreciates it first ("it" being you here).
Furthermore, it is so pretentious to care about someone's finances when you tried to ruin them emotionally.
These things make me angry, sorry
You are in a better place now and we all love you (and stuff) xx
Wooh:(
Am pretty damn sure the girl doesn't want to talk about insurance cover! Seems like a random attempt to get in touch ... but for whatever reason, do you really want to be back in regular contact again??
Normally I think olive branches are good things but in this case I'm with Zuze; twat her over the head with it and run ...
I agree with Chloe on this one. You're a celebrity ;) Or maybe not, I don't know the girl so I shouldn't be saying. I can't understand my own actions, let alone other people's. :P But why are you so interested? ;)
Based on what everyone else has said...Don't even respond.
She wants you.
I don't know anything about the particulars of your relationship or the breakup, but just because she hurt you so much doesn't mean that she doesn't care about you in some small way or something.
I think your response was very appropriate and the matter probably doesn't deserve any more consideration. Leave the past in the past and whatever you do, don't encourage any contact!
Thanks again for your take on this subject. I don't blog about my ex much because, up until recently, she was long gone and out of contact. She will remain that way. She has to. She's too hard to be around, too damaging to herself and those around her. I decided to leave after a 18 months of mental torture and confusion. I mean, you know someone is bad for you when you have to have therapy! Since then, I'm almost sad to admit, things have been incredible. Things have really taken off. Last year was my re-invention. I decided to take my life back and it felt amazing, it still does. I've got more friends now, opportunities...I'm nothing like the broken down whipping boy I used to be.
Your comments mean a lot because I appreciate your input and honesty. You're all fantastic people whose opinions I value highly.
The post script to all this is that since my response there has been nothing. If she wasn't trying to crowbar her way back into my life then I'm not sure what the point of the message was. We're not friends, we haven't spoken in so long, so it kind of disturbs me that she things we are still okay. It means she didn't take in anything I said to her when we last spoke. It means she hasn't learned a thing. She used to be an amazing, sweet person and it's those memories I want to hold onto..
It took me a long time to be this 'tough' (If you can call it that) and I learnt a lot of harsh lessons along the way (A lot of which ended up in that film I keep harping on about)
It's all by-the-by now and things are different. I was more confused than upset. It was the randomness more than anything. The randomness I've come to expect and not miss.
You know how sometimes in a horror movie you want to shout at a character "Don't go down THOSE stairs!"...
And much like the character on screen, I would be dead. My parents terrified that I'll cave and go back. That can't and won't happen. You know how crazy she is
I'm glad her reappearance hasn't upset you. Don't try to understand it - she's too unpredictable for that.
xxx
She's not even a curiosity anymore, just a bad footnote in my life. She's in the 'What the fuck were you thinking?' section. Oh, we had good times, very good times but they're all crushed by the lies and shit slinging.
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