..Lot of shots, a lot of dancing..
..Today I plan to lie down for a while.
***
Here's a little bit from the first episode of 'What The Hell...' that I'm going to throw at the BBC when I go to 'Eee' London.
The series will feature the two characters from 'Bent Soul' and their non-adventures.
Ryan and Kyle are best friends and house mates. They've known each other since they were knee-high. Kyle loves Ryan like a brother. Ryan, a sufferer of rare condition called 'Bent Soul', doesn't share the same view. Every day it gets a little harder for them to co-exist.
Episode One features Kyle testing Ryan's sanity by competing in a local wrestling event as an early (and unfathomable) birthday present to his long-suffering friend.
Despite his lack of skill, strength and in-ring ability, Kyle the Killllller ("I'm so dangerous that I can't even spell properly") believes he can beat legendary bruiser Bonnie the Beast.
INT - GYM - DAY
Kyle hits a punch bag. Ryan reads a book entitled: "How to fix a broken soul"
KYLE
I reckon I've got a good chance against that Bonnie guy. What do you think, Ryan? Ryan! What do you think? Do you think I can kick off his ass and hand it to him?
RYAN
I wouldn't place a bet on it.
KYLE
(Not getting his sarcasm)
I forgot that you don't bet anymore. Not since that time you placed a bet on the Grand National and your horse blew up. What are the odds of spontaneous horse combustion? I suppose that's a wager in itself. I think I'll have a good chance of beating him. It's the classic David and Goliath confrontation! The bigger they are, the harder they fall. I'm agile, like a feisty mouse and he's like a hippo in Speedos. You wait until you see me out there. You'll have to polygraph your eyes because you won't believe them. You'll have a new found respect for me after Friday night. Maybe you will even fear me a little. Are you listening to me, Ryan?
RYAN
Did you know that lying in a bath full of sparrows beaks is supposed to boost your sex drive? Where would I get enough beaks to fill a bath? How are beaks supposed to help your sex drive? I'd imagine they would hinder it if anything.
KYLE
You believe in me, don't you?
RYAN
Honestly?
KYLE
Yes.
RYAN
He's going to pummel you into man-jelly.
Kyle hits a punch bag. Ryan reads a book entitled: "How to fix a broken soul"
KYLE
I reckon I've got a good chance against that Bonnie guy. What do you think, Ryan? Ryan! What do you think? Do you think I can kick off his ass and hand it to him?
RYAN
I wouldn't place a bet on it.
KYLE
(Not getting his sarcasm)
I forgot that you don't bet anymore. Not since that time you placed a bet on the Grand National and your horse blew up. What are the odds of spontaneous horse combustion? I suppose that's a wager in itself. I think I'll have a good chance of beating him. It's the classic David and Goliath confrontation! The bigger they are, the harder they fall. I'm agile, like a feisty mouse and he's like a hippo in Speedos. You wait until you see me out there. You'll have to polygraph your eyes because you won't believe them. You'll have a new found respect for me after Friday night. Maybe you will even fear me a little. Are you listening to me, Ryan?
RYAN
Did you know that lying in a bath full of sparrows beaks is supposed to boost your sex drive? Where would I get enough beaks to fill a bath? How are beaks supposed to help your sex drive? I'd imagine they would hinder it if anything.
KYLE
You believe in me, don't you?
RYAN
Honestly?
KYLE
Yes.
RYAN
He's going to pummel you into man-jelly.
11 comments:
you said man jelly he he he he he he
I sure did.
CHRIS
(Big long speech)
STEVE
You had me at 'man jelly'
The end of Jerry Maquire re-written for Westfield
cool which one of us is Tom Cruise? I should really watch that film but I havent got the money
lol That book Ryan is reading must be really interesting! Great advice...the bath full of beaks lol
haha, I would watch it! Nice one Christopher :)
i really like the dynamic between these two characters.
Kyle is such a saucy funny character and Ryan keeps him grounded. and the whole concept of having a bent soul, is extremely amusing.. and how you make all the other characters relate to his situation.
you're good my friend. i hope BBC does something with it.
and i totally was going to suggest dark blue for your hair, but i read the comments of that post and it seems that you read my mind!!
yesss.. i love when things work out like that.
Maddy---You say the sweetest things! You're a ball of awesome.
Mr Awesome---You are. I'm Rene. Rene all the way. I'm not cool enough to be Cuba. Well, I may be after 'Boat Trip' and 'Rat Race' but back in '96, Cuba Gooding was, well, GOODing.
Devil Mood---I'm glad you liked it. I like to know what amuses me, amuses other prople.
Maja---Bless ya, sweetness! When you and Geezer are in the U.K, I'll show you DRTN if you want.
Sarah---I hope so. I love writing about best friends who bounce off each other (not literally) It's a lot like real life.
Corinna---I'll looki into them, dream woman (For those that aren't clued up as to why I called her that , see a few posts down. Corinna made a cameo in my dream state a couple of nights ago. Strange because we've never met.
Sarah---Electric Blue! It's been chopped and cropped. A mildly new look.
Trix---Glad you dug it. It makes me beam :)
nice.although the words 'man jelly' just puts me plain off my dinner.
look forward to catching up curly. 2 pints of lager and a packet of crisps thanks. do they still do those bar snacks called....oh,ive forgottn now.maybe theyre called 'snax',or something like that.
:)
They do! You could always have a pack of scampi fries if you're feeling sinister!
It'll be good to meet up. Much fun indeed!
Excellent work sir. Please continue to live my desired life for me much better than I ever could for the next 1000 years.
Your pal,
"Dr" Frrrrrrr
Post a Comment