Honesty List

After reading a few other blog posts about 'Sevens' I thought to myself 'I could do that'.

I couldn't.

I don't know if it's from only having 2 hours sleep or if '7 things I'll...' was a bit too much (Or too little. At this point it's all askew) I decided to do a different version of it. A remix if you will.
For those with a whiff of interest into my strange little world, here is a random list of random stuff.


Before I Die I Want To:

• Swim with sharks
• Write more films
• Make a punk/folk record
• Direct a music video
• Meet Ryan Adams
• Slap a celebrity on my 'Celebrity Slap List'
• Shag a celebity on my 'Celebrity Shag List'
• Go to NYC, Utah etc
• Perform stand-up properly
• Own a monkey for a day (Maybe two)
• Design tee-shirts

I Know I Will Never:

• Watch 'Watership Down' again
• Do most of the things in the list above
• Have children
• Get my hardcover 'Dark Knight Returns' back
• Meet Woody Allen
• Drive a car
• Smoke
• Commit myself to someone
• Live to be an old man
• Get tired of my band of brothers

I look for the following things in the opposite sex:

• Creativity
• Humour
• Truth
• Grace
• Good music and film taste
• Nice enough face

I'd be lying if I said I was:

• Flawless
• Good at sports
• A good dancer
• A half-decent singer
• Whitney Houston
• A fan of mobile phones
• Good with technology

I don't believe in the following things:

• Religion
• The British Government
• War (I'd be a bit fucked up if I did)
• Love
• Reality television
• Eric fucking Idle

I fancy the following rich, famous or otherwise people:

• Britney Murphy
• Jessica Alba
• Natalie Portman
• Alex Zane

I wish the following people were still alive:

• Jeff Buckley
• Bill Hicks
• Eliott Smith
• Nick Drake
• Peter Cook
• Granddad

I wish the following people were dead (Or I'd sacrifice any of the following to resurrect any of the above)

**Removed for the sake of karma***

There was more but I got bored.