"Whatever happens on tour, stays on tour..."

Hey kids!
How the devil are you all?
I just came back from a mad one in Southampton. Frolicals were had and drink, well, there's always drink isn't there? Sometimes it's themed on characters from Lord Of The Rings, sometimes it's not even out of a glass.

Perhaps 'Propaganda' should be changed to 'Christopher Bate's Tales From The Indie Bar (Sometimes he does a bit of writing)' Perhaps not.

Anyway, Nick and I took a road trip to Eastleigh to see my cousin Adam and his delightful American girlfriend, Victoria (I don't know why I felt compelled to mention her nationality) We went to a cool bar called The Avondale House where I drank my bodywieght in high-energy drinks mixed with Vodka. This gave me the boost to shimmy and shake at Lennons, a small indie bar that plays great music.
Based on my tee-shirt (FACT: Pirates hate Ninjas) we asked a group of random people which side they would be on. A lot of people opted to be ninjas. I'd be a pirate. You call fall into being a pirate. You just have to grow a beard and say 'ARRG!' occassionally. A ninja takes effort and patience. I don't have much of either. I can grow a beard and become a salty sea dog. I just need to know how to use a cutlass.
How hard could that be?
We decided that it would make a great film. Ninjas! Pirates! A smackdown for the ages! We had it cast and everything. (If you have any thoughts on the matter then feel free to throw down your ideas in the comments section.) It was all of blurred tapestry of music and booze. I'm not sure why but a group of girls decided they wanted to lick my stomach and one chap wanted a dance off.
The second day involved some shopping (New jeans as I'd managed to scuff up the pair I was wearing) and some sight seeing around Southampton. Adam and his lady went to see something called a 'football match'. I've heard many things about this game. Sometimes people get upset about it.

We then met some of Adam's friends. Strangely, in a 'It's a small world' moment, Adam's housemate is someone I used to chat to on the View Askew/Kevin Smith Message board. It was like a geeks reunion.

HIM: "Fielding Melish?"

ME: "Skeeball Pete?!"

We refrained from using smilies.
(For extra 'Chris is a nerd' points the name Fielding Melish comes from the name of Woody Allen's character in Bananas. You can stop reading now.)

We met some more of his friends, including another American girl (Again, I have no idea why I felt compelled to mention that) and had a curry. I don't normally do spicy food (It plays havoc with my stomach and it costs loads) but it was nice.
I met Adam's friend Paul who runs the official Sigur Ros Website. We then moved onto The Hobbit and had plenty of Gollums, Frodos and Gandalfs (They don't do an Aragorn for some reason. You'd think they would) They have a killer juke box there which I loaded with quality tracks (Interpol, The Cure, Jeff Buckley)

It was a good soundtrack to the merriment. We then shifted along to Lennons again where I was hit by massive fatigue (Meaning I was tired and not assaulted by a pissed off wrestler) It soon perked up when they played the right songs.
A couple of girls approached me and my brother and asked if we wanted to join them. Being nice, friendly types we obliged and followed them. They lead us over to a table of guys. They all looked as confused as us. We nodded awkward hellos.
"So, how do you know the, uh, girls?"
"We don't they just lead us over here."
I learnt a vital lesson. Women are both confusing and powerful. Anyway, that's all I can remember. It was that kind of fun.

I'm off to eat crackers and play pictionary with Tom.

Pics (From Top):

A pint of Gollum
A Pint of Gandalf
Me in The Avondale Toilets.