It may no surprise any of you to hear this, but I'm not what you would call the 'corporate type'. My 9 to 5 is merely a means to an end and this particular 'end' is simply to keep a roof over my head and fund various freakend adventures. I ask for nothing in my crappy office job and I give little in return. It's a fair deal really; I turn up, log on and I do what they need me to do for the duration of my shift. I do it purely for the money and I make no bones about it. In a twisted way, I'm an almost ideal employee. I get on, socialize with my friends and make everyone’s day a little easier. I can't lie that I don't road test 'material' and harvest ideas during the work day. I do. I always have and, if fate doesn't throw me a break, always will.
I can never be 'my job' unless my job is writing. To me, that IS my job. The pay isn't as forthcoming but the kudos and smiles keep me in good stead and, in many cases, out of a coffin. I can never be the guy who bleats so enthusiastically about figures, market shares and all that shit. I can't get excited about something that I didn't help to create. If I ever get the chance to work on a film full time (And that may happen in the near future, fingers crossed) I will work in every area; doing anything and everything that is needed of me. I will work my increasingly tight ass off and more besides. I just can't get turned on by ordinary office work. I'll play along but I won't sweat blood over it. It's not my thing. Today, this ethic became clear when I realized that my managers don't like me very much. I sat in a meeting and endured a few pot shots from the sour-faced, shrug that laughably calls herself my superior. This is nothing new. I've noticed a common trend of Chris-bashing in recent weeks mostly because I have this urge to speak out when they try and break down other employees and force another bullshit procedure upon those whose lives depend on their job.
I'm no Michael Moore (Again, I point to my ass) but I'm not going to stand by and watch them bully a bunch of decent people just because they earn more a bit more money. Money cannot buy character or class. Look at Lindsey Lohan or Britney. Fuck, look at Ozzy Osbourne. So, I'm probably disliked for this and that's why I get the odd, unwitty comment thrown my way. This is fine sometimes. I let them have their licks because I know this is all they have. The only thing they're ever be known for is being a 'decent office worker' where as one of 'their' under-valued lackeys probably plays bass in some awesome band and another is a swish comedian waiting for their break (I know these people).
They will never know creativity because they killed any aspect of it when they knelt down and swallowed their 'opportunity' all those years ago. (You KNOW that happens.) Anyway, this tool of tedium runs through the blah, blah, blah and announces she is leaving. Her final potshot came when she tacked on 'I'm sure Christopher will be more than happy to see me go' (I'm paraphrasing, she's not the best public speaker) Everyone turns to me and I lean back on my chair and shrug. I respond with a simple 'I'm indifferent to whatever you do' Okay, so it wasn't Bill Hicks but it did the trick and it was truthful. I don't care.
I CARE what Woody Allen is up to, I CARE about my favourite bands next record, I CARE about what my friends, online and off, are up to, I CARE about a lot of things, trivial things, I don't care about someone that I don't respect. You can't make me. I'm not a mean guy. I like my colleagues, they keep me sane when alls too much. I like them so much that I want them to quit and do something less soul-sapping. I'll quit too. I'm driven by something else. Success or failure, it's a lot better than being a 'yes man'
11 comments:
Hurrah for you and the sucinct response to the nasty ladydeee.
"I will work my increasingly tight ass off": Heh. But why is it increasingly tightening? Some kind of special exercising?
I think you've hit the nail on the head, and there is a huge distinction between what someone does and who they are. Who someone is, or who they choose to be, is not defined by their job, or even who they are, it's defined by what they strive to be. Not everyone chooses to be their job.
Dan--I've been working out. I wouldn't say it was special. i suppose it is actually because it seems to be working. It gets slapped and pinched a lot more than it used to.
I'm not as plump as I used to be thanks to my wise friend H and his health programme.
I'll be honest with you, Dan i just wanted to, just once, write 'increasingly tight ass' in a blog post.
Jack-- I was actually going to post this on TWO NIL..but I couldn't get on the site for some reason. I'm having no end of woe with blogger and my house mates computer tonight! I hope I can comment...
I'm glad you agree. I think most of my blog buddies will because we all seem to be a creative bunch with a lot to offer than just being hapless desk monkeys.
There's been occasional problems with the hosting at 20__, so it may not be your friend's computer.
Okay, I'm just tinkering with some stuff at the moment. I'm hoping that, if things take off, I can maybe post all the film-related stuff there.
Chris i am sick of people who define themselves in terms of work, any work.
We are more than what we do, whether we do it to survive or to express ourselves.
Having said that, i can't begin to imagine how stupid some people can be in corporations. They still buy the myth that if the company makes money, they'll make money. They are not shareholders, when are they going to get it through their heads?
I love this blog. Go you.
I was once becoming a yes man but I recognised it and got out quick. When I did get out I went into a job I loved but was underpaid. I am still in that job, still underpaid, still considering whether I need to go get a higher paid job that I wont enjoy. But then like you say is it worth the pain, is it worth being a yes man.
I think no.
I can relate, Chris. I followed my passion and was one of the lucky ones; and now, I write and teach and research and have been fortunate enough to have been able to make a living doing all the things I love. Not everyone is so fortunate, but I think you have described this situation perfectly.
That woman deserved nothing from you. Sounds like she was the tight ass....
I admire you tremendously
Christopher - you are a good man.
With a courageous heart.
You are not your job or -
your paycheck and clearly
you won't be bullied into
turning the other cheek.
Good on you:)
Your bosses sound much like the fools that most of us (except the lucky ones) have to cope with every day. I think you're right, in almost all office jobs the work itself is meaningless and it's all about the colleagues that become friends and the humour that you share...
Dude, you'll go far.
One day, you'll have your own office.
Imagine, 9 to 5 for the rest of your life...
No... wait... you wouldn't want that...
Heh.
It's just a job; you've the right attitude to see your way through the usual work-related nonsense.
And, don't worry... I'm sure one day you'll find a suitable Bill Hicks jibe to send their way!
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