"Please do come forward---"

Crime Watch. A long running staple of British Television which attempts to get the general public to help with crimes and misdemeanours caused by the dregs of British society. It's a good idea in theory, use the most potent medium to get the attention of those welded to their couches and armchairs. The idea being that some of their audience could be key witnesses who could help to name and shame the wrong-doer.
They do this by 'reconstructing' the crime scene with the WORST ACTORS imaginable. It's common knowledge that their reconstructions have the impact and acting depth of an infants nativity and this only serves to make serious events seem highly comical. The show is highly popular with students and looking for something resembling comedy on the BBC.
Tonight, Crime Watch managed to step into 'Brass Eye' territory. A police constable turned to the presenter and said, in the straightest of faces, that the armed robber they were looking was described as having 'a triangular face'. They then proceeded to show a photo-fit of the accused. He looked like something out of 'Bo Selecta'.
Good luck closing the case on that one, Scotland Yard.