LAAAAAAAXXXXXXXX

I've been adding people to my links. Give me a shout if you're a regular commenter and I have forgotten you...

...Things are a little ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRG! (The noise Charlie Brown used to make) of late. Things are not so great at my nine to five.

I can't really detail now but I most likely will...at length...in RED, BOLD fonts.

Play nice.

Although I've had a pretty nice, productive day away from the office. I've settled down to watch some random flicks on the movie channels I rarely take advantage of.

I'm currently watching 'New York Minute' and enjoying it a little more than I should.

I'm not sure who my favourite Olsen twin is....

...I think it may be the punkier one...

Please don't hate me.

I know nothing of the crunch

How was your freakend?
I was riding the crazy train over the weekend and it stopped off at some pretty strange stations (I'm not sure where I'm going with this...)

Blast Off was pretty cool. I managed to get a free Massive Attack t-shirt and I bumped into a lot of old friends, some of whom I haven't been able to see because of 'Ye Olde Break-Up' (Remember the time when I never used to mention this? It's easier these days, natual almost. That's got to be good, right)

It was fun. I bumped into some girls from work who came dressed as Angels. I got to wear the halo and wings for a while which proved to be an interesting look for me. (I have pictures.)

Stephanie kindly sent me the following review of 'Death Etc', a script I sent her. It was a nice little boost on a Monday morning:



LOVE STINKS


'Death ETC' is a sort of sequel to Christopher's first short film 'Death Rides the Nine'. At the end of that film, Sam is spared death and given the chance to rebuild his life and relationship with sweetheart Emma. 'Death ETC' opens a year later with Sam and Emma mourning the end of their three-year relationship. Both are upset, but while Sam still wants to try again, Emma has started seeing someone new and wants to move on. Her refusal to make another go and her taking of a new partner destroys Sam who, despite the cajoling of friends, sinks deep into despair and attempts to take his own life. He is saved by his old friend Death (Grim Reaper) who insists that he isn't on his list of souls to reap and heals the bleeding young man. As in 'Death Rides the Nine', Sam manages to convince him to stick around for a while to hang out and enjoy earthly pleasures. Over the course of the weekend Sam learns about life, love, death and what Santa gets roped into doing in the off-season and Death learns about booze, wrestling, Blood Brothers and the bloody-minded stubbornness of humans.

The early part of the film focuses on Sam's reaction to the split with Emma and accurately captures the physical pain that you experience when your heart is breaking. You've all been there (and, if you haven't, you will) and reading it on the page brings back memories of the ache you feel when you've lost someone and the blow you experience when you see that you've been replaced all too soon by an inferior model. 'You'll also recognise the reaction of his friends: they say he's great, diss Emma and suggest a steady diet of parties and casual sex. All of which appeals to Sam for a split moment, but despite their best efforts he doesn't feel great about himself, he still loves Emma and can't yet look at other girls. In Hollywood clichés, Sam would transform himself into a sexy-cool all-American hunk (gag!) making an ungrateful Emma jealous. Thankfully, this film doesn't follow clichés. Sam doesn't change overnight and Emma isn't a vindictive cow. In fact, she seems to be a sweet and caring woman who, unwisely but understandably, tries to get over a broken relationship by turning to the arms of another. The film cleverly includes home video footage of Emma and Sam in the early days of their relationship when they were happy illustrating what it is that Sam has lost and why he is so heartbroken. That is why the relationship between Sam and Death is so important. While Sam's other friends quickly turn to denigrating Emma, Sam is mourning something special and Death and understands that. The two men formed a bond a year earlier and Death is able to offer wise words to help Sam. In many ways, Death is the ideal friend to have in circumstances like that because he is close enough to care but still able to offer an outsider's perspective of the situation.

The film isn't all tears, heartbreak and suicide, however. Sam's friends provide laughs through strange but funny analogies ("consider yourself a Nintendo..") and the relationship between Sam and Death is filled with laughs in between the heart-to-hearts. Death approaches his weekend with Sam with child-like glee and their adventures at the cinema watching 'The Seventh Seal' and at a wrestling match had me laughing out loud. Death's dry humour and Sam's sarcasm worked well and made for sharp and funny dialogue.

Unsurprising to anyone who is familiar with Chris's love of music, this film features some great songs played at exactly the right moments. Whether they were played as background music or were incidental things like a mobile ring tone, they elegantly added to the scenes. I'm not sure of the legal whatsits that dictate whether songs can be played in movies but when this film is made I sincerely hope the director sticks to his suggested soundtrack.

Speaking of the director, I hope this film gets one. I so enjoyed Death Rides the Nine that I want to see this story come to its conclusion as Chris envisaged it. So if you have any clout in the film industry, can you help get this film made? You would make me a happy girl.



I didn't pay her for this contrary to how it may seem. I'm glad she enjoyed it.

Anyway, enough about me? How are you?

Man, last night was heeeeeaavvvvvvy!

My legs hurt because I danced them into nothing.

I had a lot of guys come up and hug me last night. I'm not complaining, a hug is a hug at the end of the day/night. Maybe it was my musk..

But it got surreal. We went for post-club snacks, finding a takeaway just down the way. We go in and get our food come out minutes later to find the police sealing off the area. Some guy had jumped off the roof.

He'd been carted off by the time we got out. It was pretty strange.

Anyway, catching up on a bit of sleepy before we head out and do the drinking and dancing thing all over again.

It's all play and no rest....

Optimistic Rejection/La Freakend Begineth...

Sadly, DRTN won't be playing at '7 inch 22' on Tuesday. Despite the fact that the organisers enjoyed it, the film is too long for the programme.

There may be a chance that it will play at a future event so I'm keeping all crossables crossed. Their events look great fun and it would be awesome to be a part of one someday.
The film has opened up some interesting doors and exposed me to the creative side of the 'West Mids' that I never knew existed.

I've seen some great talent over the last couple of months and I've been lucky enough to rub shoulders with some of them, even going so far as to help as much as I can.

The contacts made at The Light House show last month have lead me to some interesting places. The most thrilling being the BBC. They are apparently very interested in me and Mr Thompson (Writer of 'Brown Paper Bag' and 'Bouncer') has been talking me up a small storm (I'm not even paying him for his praise). I've fired off an email to the Beeb and I'm eagerly awaiting a response from my contact there (I sound like a spy)...

..It may or may not lead to anything but it's good that things have got this far. Who knows what it could mean for me and Kyle?...

...Hey, it's almost the Freakend, guys and girls and you know what that means! It's time to hang up your 9 to 5 and enjoy the time with your nearest and dearest. I'm off to Ramshackles tonight with Nick and Mans. We'll glug down the redbull and vodka combos and bust mad moves until 4 in the am. YOU should come. You'd love it...

Get drunk

Get loose

Kiss someone

Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

Have fun!

~~~C~~~

Tending The Flowers and whatnot

What ho, blogger people!

My post rate has been pretty lousy this week. There has been a lot going on and I've barely had a minute to stop and 'tend the flowers' (That expression could mean ANYTHING when you think about it)
There are some pretty exciting things that I don't want to blog about just yet lest I jinx them and I look foolish (Or MORE foolish)

I've been scribbling things at quite a frantic rate which is always good because when I don't have anything to scribble I am at a complete loss and I just sort of wonder round in circles kicking the odd goose before settling down to watch 'Hogan Knows Nothing'.
I need something to do between the indie adventures and the preening (I have pretty big hair now)

My friend Stephanie was lucky/unlucky enough to be able to read my proposed follow-up/feature version of DRTN, cleverly titled 'Death Etc' (It was a working title that just stuck) She seemed to really enjoy the mix of awkward comedy, slapstick and bitching (It was written at the time of my HORRIBLE break-up) More so than any production company would. Still, I like it and I'm glad she did too. It means a lot to me and so does she...

I've also been trying to get in contact with old friends and arrange adventures for the coming months. Next month should be madcrazybusy what with The Mighty Boosh, Teddy Thompson, Jenny Lewis, Yeah Yeah Yeahs etc.

I'm hoping that these exciting events will pan out so I can share them with you and you can all tell me to "STOP TALKING ABOUT YOUR BORING ASS LIFE AND WRITE THAT STUPID STUFF YOU SO SO WELL/UNWELL"

I do plan to put more fiction and less, uh, faction on this blog at some point in the nearly future.

I've been reading, enjoying and romancing all of your blogs. You know how much i treasure them. What would I do without them? I'd most likely die of office-related fatalities.

I'm trying hard to get a decent nights sleep. Over the last couple of nights I have woke up startled, sat up or singing. Anyone got any tips?

Listen to Shearwater.

Snuggle up to something.

Self/Worth/Less

Scott Halford, the guy who played the lead in 'Death Rides the Nine', has made an experimental film called 'Self/Worth/Less' (I wish I'd thought of that title!) that looks interesting.

Go here.

Blank screens and error messages

Blogger has been a real pain lately (Blank screens and error messages which some may argue is better than the usual content) so if you can read this it means that it's actually working. If this keeps up I'm going to have to flee to myspace because I'm feeling pretty picked on my Blogger at the moment...

...Things have been happening but my life is kind of flat after the screening last month. How do you follow up the best day of your life?..

(Febuary 16th 2006 rugby tackled the top-spot from June 11 2000)

...You can't. The subsequent weeks have been spent in a post-celebration, let's-milk-it-for-all-its-worth fun fest. It's been great but there are these nagging thoughts of 'what now?' 'what happens next?' and 'Oh no! please don't let that be it!' I really hope that I get more chances to be creative. I haven't planned for a 'normal, parent-pleasing' career. My office job is **READ MY MIND HERE** and I need something more stimulating...

...Perhaps I can work in a Zoo. I've always wanted to be an enclosure of stunned Lions. I'd do a little dance, perhaps play horsey with one of them. I know of someone who tried to do this and almost got his face clawed off...

...Speaking of having my face clawed off, I met up with someone that I perhaps should not have met up with. I extended an olive branch (A short, slightly frail branch) to an old flame. I had this urge to check my legacy and, on closer inspection, it seems that I have left a pretty solid mark on the lives of her and her family. This was important to me because, after all the bad stuff that often comes hand-in-hand with my ex, I needed to know that my efforts were not in vain and that I was remembered in the right way...

...The weekend was pretty freaky. Freaky in a good way. We all went to Ramshackles and danced until 4am. We followed it up with a night in Wolverhampton but the music wasn't as good. The DJ was stuck in the Brit-Pop era. (My least favourite music era) We still had fun though thanks to our shiny optimism...

...I'm very tired. Due to severe lack of sleep I started seeing things last night on the way home from H's. I kept seeing shadow men, leaping about. It was a little scary. Has that kind of thing ever happened to you?

The toys I used to play with

Manta Force. Best play things ever.

More Adventurous

I'm fighting the urge to form an Alt-Country band. We'd be called 'The Predicaments' We'd try to sound like Whiskeytown but instead of tales of love gone wrong, we'd sing about pirates, giant crabs and Spongebob.

Pitchfork will love us.

I/we are planning much needed adventures. March has been a *meh* month so April has to shine a lot brighter..

..Maybe this???..

..Seven Inch Cinema put on some kick ass indie film festivals and I want in on '7 inch #22'.

Belated Freakend Photos

Personal Jesus

"The world is like a ride in an amusement park. And when you choose to go on it, you think it's real because that's how powerful our minds are. And the ride goes up and down and round and round. It has thrills and chills and it's very brightly coloured and it's very loud and it's fun, for a while. Some people have been on the ride for a long time and they begin to question, is this real, or is this just a ride? And other people have remembered, and they come back to us, they say, "hey - don't worry, don't be afraid, ever, because, this is just a ride..."

---Bill Hicks

The unknowing of things..

..Is always the biggest thrill for me. I pit myself out there a lot more than I used to (I suppose this Blog is the biggest example) because I’m not afraid or ashamed of who I am. After a much needed, pick-me-up weekend with the 'Good, Good People' I'm feeling pretty charged and eager to see what this week has in store.
Last week could be summed up with a shrug. I haven't had such a mediocre week for a long time. I was flawed by low morale, a stinking head cold and morbid curiosity.

That's not a great little jackpot of things.

Dancing and drinking at RamShackles was a nice way to start things off. I felt a little bad for bailing out on Nick and Matt to do my good deed last week (See earlier posts) so i wanted to see the night out without walking off or sulking...

..The heroic amount of caffeine-based vodka drinks stopped me from sitting still or going to sleep.

The quieter moments of the weekend saw me do my uncle thing with my little niece. She's at that age where she wants to play all the time and I'm was at that stage where my head felt like I had a parade running through it. I'll tell you, being hit over the head with a plastic rattle doesn't do much for the hangover. Still, the kid is adorable and I'm a sucker for punishment...

Nick and I headed over to see Matt in Saturday evening and we headed to The Little Civic where they were having a launch party for Graham Coxon's new record 'Love Travels at Illegal Speeds'. I did my first decent deed of the evening and grabbed one of the promo t-shirts for Nick.

We drank up our cola and vodkas and headed to Blast Off (Where else?) to dance it all off. It was a fun time and we had more than enough room to throw shapes and waggle limbs.
I also came to the aid of an old friend (A sort of ex) who was a little upset and out of sorts (There must be something in the air) after telling her a few jokes, catching up and giving her a big hug. We parted ways; she feeling a little better and me feeling happy for having helped her out. I think I'm in serious credit with karma at this point...

...Maybe I can use the credit to kick a couple of Geese. Nobody likes Geese. They're like bargain basement swans...

Christopher's Non-post

Don't get me started on either Jaws: The Revenge or Judge Dredd: The Movie. I could do a one man show about them...maybe I will...I was thinking about it. Someone asked me the other day whether I would be interested in standing up in front of people and telling 'silly stories and see what happens'. I suppose technically I did that the other week at The Light House...

...Honestly, who would want to see that???...

...There was a real post but it died. Blogger is being a real bitch today. It keeps telling me I'm 'Forbidden'...

Baker is Back!

One of my favourite Bloggers has come out of Blog-retirement! Ben "Fandango" Baker is back! Worship at his alter HERE.

He's a funny, funny, funny man and his radio shows used to be the highlight of many a dull Monday.

Welcome back, Sir.

It’s been a long week and I need a good freakend. I need good music, good company and good stories to tell.

I want to act foolish, drink irresponsibly and talk to random people about random things.
I don't want to worry about money, the weather, my future or my past.

Right now, it's as good as it ever is, better than it's ever been but tomorrow it could be anything at all. My life, if nothing else, always seems to be full of surprises.

Happy Freakend girls and boys.

If you've had a run-of-the-mill week like I've had then you deserve some guilt free joy-joy.

~~C~~

Random Aptness

This is why I love music. Sometimes, you look around for something to vocalise what's going on in your mind and then a beautiful song comes along to help you out...


I tried to save a girl I truly loved and didn’t quite know how to help her
So now she’s sleeping as the parrots up above cried everythings so they can tell her
And when I did my good deed I thought I’d feel a broken gladness
But standing in the street alone I just felt sinking sadness

Girl you died will know us bliss
So hang up your veil and dress
Look at me and take one guess
Where this best intention love will lead us

I once felt a feeling fully through though I knew I shouldn’t feel it
Because to act on it I’d be a person who should be slapped into a strait jacket
So every time it comes around I just let it die inside me
You said I only come around because I just need you to hide me

So we knelt in rusted weeds
Sticks and sharp rocks cutting into our knees
And I thought that we would freeze
But there was just too much more blood in our bodies

I’m not gonna make you take the pills though you should really think about it
The fire by which we both were almost killed glows so beautiful don’t doubt it
But we have to make a choice now can we go without it

There’s a space I tried to fill
But I’m scared now I never will
You fly around while I stand still
Till I slowly just get smaller and smaller

I tried to save a girl I truly loved and I never would desert her
And we both found out that I was dreaming of the day I thoroughly could hurt her
When I saw myself inside her eyes a shrinking would be savior
Resented her for never needing help and couldn’t wait just to betray her

So we drove back to her place
From this temporary home that we had made
I stepped back into my street
Feeling a fool as though my life has slowly shrunk away from me

With my good deed
With my good deed
With my good deed
Come on


--My Good Deed by Shearwater

Flirting

I'm either really bad at it or so good I'm not aware of my skills.

No good deed goes unpunished

I think the cold walk in the snow has taken it's toll on me. I'm feeling pretty sick at the moment and I going hot and cold...is there a doctor in the house?

The fallout from the other evening has resulted in something resembling harmony between me and my ex.
She was moved to text me yesterday but, unlike before, my world didn't come to a halt this time...
Although I won't take her up on her offer of meeting up anytime soon, I feel pretty proud about the way I behaved. I helped someone who needed to be helped. She just happened to be someone I used to care for.

..I don't know what is going to happen now. She seems to be stuck in something of a rut. She said that she has nothing in her life and that she is trapped with a load of guilt and regret (This may not be the whole truth just a version she thinks I want to hear..you can never tell). There is nothing I can do about this because to help her further would be damaging to myself. I have been there before and it wasn't pretty...

...She's a world away from me now and it's a shame she hasn't found her own happiness. Although karma seems to have picked on her, it would have been nice to see that she had settled a little bit. Ho-hum....

...Thank you so much for your support and kind words over the last few days. I'm sick as a dog (I'm going to have to miss the 'After Hours' event tonight) but I'm not hung-up on things. Your gestures have helped to make me realise that I wasn't as stupid as I originally thought...

...Thanks to Steve, Mark and Nick for coming to pick me up at Stupid O'Clock in the early hours of Sunday morning. It was a rescue and I'm pretty sure I'd be a hell of a lot worse off if it wasn't for their friendship. To me, that's an example of what true friendship is all about.

Error

this post is linked to the 'EH?' post. A post-script to the whole sudden ex intervention. I've fucked up big time. To be honest, my actions this weekend have been a major set back. They have put me back to a place i havent been for a long time..

...it was all going so well. i had all the right people there, celebrating Matt's birthday. We had hit a few bars and we'd been accumulating people for our adventure. It was looking pretty sweet and we were in good spirits when we got to Blast Off.

We were dancing. SHE was there like I knew she would be. Something was telling me that, after the out-of-the-blue text the other day, she would be there loud and proud.

After a few shots and a few dances I was feeling pretty drunk and stupid.. what did I do, after almost a year of being this supposedly new man?
I go up to her and ask what the text was all about. I opened the door like an idiot. The next thing we are talking about old times and i'm telling her about the film. She was a wreck. She cried a lot of the time, I didn't want her to. She cried because she said things weren't going so well and her new man was mean and her life was full of working and drinking...

...I could have/should have left it there. I should have waltzed off thanking karma for doing some good work on someone who had made great lengths to disrupt my life. I should have walked away...

..So upset and drunk was she that I said I would walk her home. We walked and talked to her house. She said that she would make me a tea when we got to her house. She wanted to hear about things...

..I should have walked away...

...I went back and she started crying. Loads. She was throwing up, curled in a ball about things. I wanted to perhaps looks after her more but things were different. She kept saying that I was a 'nice guy' and that it was so typical of me to see her okay even after mistake after mistake on her part...

...we talked more. She cried a lot of the time. She questioned why it went wrong and then, in a strange moment I shall never forget, started picking on my 'arrogance'. She said "You really are full of yourself now" my response was a terse "I hated myself before"..

...The next thing I know I was saying words that seemed like they were coming from someone else I was saying that i didn't understand why she was so upset. I didn't want to patronise her upset but it seemed crazy to be upset about things when she was the one that lied, cheated and picked apart this nice guy she missed so much...

...She has never been able to handle truth, to process honesty. It's not in her world. She threw me out like she did the last time we spoke. It was a long walk home. Freezing and snowy 12 mile walk to my house. The guilt of leaving my friends and missing the night for her was almost too much to bare...

...I called Mark, my house mate telling him that, due to the freezing conditions, I probably wouldn't make it back. I didn't want to. I'd made a foolish error by trying to help her...

...Steve, Nick and Mark pulled up in a car a little later on. I was cold, crying and completely distraught about how stupid I had been. After all that hard work to create a better persona after the nightmare of her, I'd buckled in a stupid attempt to help a sick, drunk girl I used to love...

...I should have walked away. I'm full of cold, full of regret and about fifty steps back. I used to love being in love. She popped that bubble by giving me a shot of unwanted reality. I loved the illusion and the myth. I didn't crumble before her. I crumbled after on...

...This isn't going to be easy to escape from but i deserve it...I'm stupid

Is anyone else loving the Jack White/ Billy Childish dispute? It's good to hear about an old fashioned rock and roll verbal ruck.

Jack has been slinging mud for quite some time now (About the time where he stop singing and started yelping) and someone has met the challenge: low-fi garage rock hero Billy Childish. Jack White has the miffed anger it seems but Billy has the better come backs. He claimed that Jack is jealous of the fact that, among other things, Billy has a better moustache...

...Maybe I'm just short of thrills today...

...Other news?...

...Film is looking to have wider distribution and, thanks to finally getting full copy-right, it'll be out and about here there and everywhere. As always, I'll squeal about when and where it's playing...

...Oh, and it looks likely that we'll have another showing at the Light House in May thanks to 'high demand'. It seems that a lot of people didn't get to see it or want to see it again. For all those that attend there will be something special as a thank you...

...Then there's the BBC...

...This coming Freakend is dedicated to my good friend Matt "Mans" Mansell for it his birthday...

...Thanks each and all for the comments in the last post. I heart you for it.

~~C~~

Eh?

I've just recieved a message from my ex. We haven't spoken in a good year after a series of her dumping on me (Not literally) and making my life all hell. Today she dropped me a SMS out of the blue about checking my mobile bill because she found out from looking at her statements that she's been having insurance cover taken out.
(We got our phones together a few years ago. We used to do coupley things because she went insane)

Why would she give a shit about my finances or my well being?

What's your take on this, guys and girls? It befuddled me...

A gift from We Are Scientists

I got home from work to find a package from We Are Scientists. Inside was a rare bit of vinyl. They asked if i wanted one a while back and I said 'yes'.

Sometimes being cheeky pays off.